previously on Dumbgeons and Dragons.
Hi, Moon.
I mean, you could probably make it in a couple 10-day.
Oh.
I'm sorry.
Excuse me.
I'm sorry.
Hold on.
Wait.
How many of the tens?
You'd have to steal something to make it worth my while here.
Oh, I don't mind stealing.
There's a shipment coming in around the same time that you're supposed to be there.
So we just have to draft up the contract here, my dear.
Your names again, Sully.
Do we need all our names down for the whole stealing thing?
The three of you seem like a good team.
We're a great team, but you know what?
Shit goes sideways.
This should be all on me.
So if we're all ready?
Yes, I think time is of the essence.
Yeah, it sounds like we're on a clock here.
There's a snap, and you see a sign that says, Hi, Moon, this way.
Well, she's accurate.
You gotta give her that.
Welcome to Dumbgeons and Dragons.
We're a D&D fifth edition actual play podcast, and I'm your dungeon master, Russ More,
and with me today is Karla Maxted.
That is me.
I play Norixious Akra, but you can call me Glam.
And Tom Laird.
That's me.
I play Moot.
And Amy More.
That's me, and I play Sullivan's Light, but you can call me Sully.
And I play your dungeon master, so you can call me that.
But don't call him late for dinner.
Yeah, whoo.
Good times.
Where you get more of those jokes.
We shouldn't jump right into it.
How's everybody doing?
Russ wants to jump right into it.
I just want to jump three seconds.
It's on task.
It's good.
It's very focused.
No, everybody have a good week.
Lots of gardening.
I moved.
It's very, I was going to say exciting, but that would be a lie.
I moved.
So, Liz, I think we all know exactly everything that's entailed with that.
I made focaccia bread on the weekend.
Ooh, that sounds more delicious.
I call it focaccia.
I was going to say you call it, you're a focaccia.
It sounds like I did my Cosmo quiz.
I'm a focaccia.
14 out of 20.
I'm a focaccia.
But, you know, it's fine.
It looked delicious.
That's for sure.
It was really good.
And I over salted it a little, but not like that was an ad thing.
It was really good.
No, it's a good thing.
Did you put like rosemary in there?
I didn't, because the recipe, I always like to make a recipe exactly as it calls
the first time and then I'll do fun things with it.
So this was just bare bones what the recipe called for.
And next time, I believe rosemary will be in there because it's going to be delicious.
There was one we made with cherry tomatoes and rosemary stuffed into the bread.
That was like in Lethbridge.
No, it wasn't.
That was in Nanaimo.
Was it in Nanaimo?
It was in Nanaimo.
I feel like it was a really, really long time ago.
I mean still, almost 10 years ago.
So apparently I don't make focaccia enough.
But where you can see all this delicious stuff is over on our Discord.
And patrons, if you want to go visit Patreon.com slash dumb dragon cast have
exclusive channels over there to discuss all of the sweet bonus content that
they get for joining us on Patreon.
What you also get when you're a patron is an episode dedicated to you.
And Russ is just going to pull that Excel sheet up here like right quick.
Let's just like jive for a little bit.
We've always got it planned out.
We've always got it totally ready.
Always.
Before we start.
We know what we're doing here.
We've been doing it for so long.
I mean, we shouldn't make fun of Russ.
Literally, could any of the three of us even find this spreadsheet?
No.
We needed to do it?
Absolutely not.
Could any of the three of us do anything for this podcast if we needed to?
Absolutely not.
No.
Like today's patron, Durgel Enisteel.
Durgel Enisteel?
What a name.
I'm very sorry if I pronounced it wrong.
No, that's a fucking name.
It is good.
I like it.
Wow.
And I don't think I've ever heard it before.
So many syllables and so many letters.
It's really exciting.
Me neither.
I love it.
Durgel.
Thank you, Durgel.
Thank you.
And if it's Durgel.
Oh.
Thank you.
Either way, we think you're great.
Thank you.
It's fantastic.
Absolutely.
Find out more at Patreon.com slash dumb dragon cast.
And now, fuck it, let's play D&D.
You were teleported by Charmy to the outskirts of the city of High Moon.
You have your donkey and cart, faithful old Rolf, and you have made your way into
the city of High Moon.
It's a large town and the capital of Deepindale, which is the area you're in.
The Dale lands, as they are otherwise referred to as.
You enter and it's about midday and the city is large.
The main population of the city are humans, elves, and half-elves.
And in fact, one of the most well-integrated settlements of those three.
Usually there is, of course, a little bit of head-butting between humans and elves,
but not here.
So that's exciting.
They solve their problems in other ways, hence all the half-elves, am I right?
Hey.
This is a very sexual city we've just entered.
Right?
Everyone's boning to solve their problems.
You walk into the town on the main road and it leads you into a open market of High
Moon.
And there are many merchants there from all across the region.
Most of them are there selling their local harvest.
Is there any, like, you know, when you are in a tourist city and they have all these
very specific things.
She wants a big pamphlet stand.
I'm wondering if there's any, like, Make Love, Not War in High Moon, because that's
clearly their whole thing.
I really like that.
So yes, there are, you know, very, not quite hippie, but.
It's like the I Heart New York, but their theme is Make Love, Not War.
Keep High Moon Weird, et cetera, et cetera.
Yeah, I like all of those.
That's what you see all over the place.
Very loving relationships between everybody are portrayed in these images.
It really is just a tight knit community.
Everybody's family until you're not.
Well, because otherwise it gets weird.
Oh, I see.
Like when you want to go to Bone Town, that's when you have to make sure.
Can't can't shouldn't be family.
No, no, I got you.
Well, there are many other people.
This PSA brought to you by incest.
Please don't.
Look at Tom's face.
He's like, don't put that in there.
Weird as fuck.
This is your first episode.
Go back a little bit.
This will seem fine.
This will be totally fine.
This will just be normal.
Guys, I really like this place.
I'm getting like a really good vibe.
Yeah, I think so, too.
It's so everyone seems so loving and like there's this great energy.
People are making out all over the place and stuff.
Maybe there's something in the water.
Maybe. Yeah, it's like this is really a different vibe than we've we've
experienced before, I think.
An older lady catches you as you're walking by, just reaches out
and grabs your arm and says, you look hungry travelers.
Can I help you?
And she shows you to her to her stand.
She's got corn and potatoes and apples and wheat, all sorts of things.
She looks like your donkey needs something to eat here.
Here, take some wheat.
Oh, we do have to feed Rolf.
Good old Rolf.
I mean, we haven't come all that far yet, but he's probably hungry.
We should get something.
I think Rolf is always hungry.
I think so, too.
All this looks like really like you got to cook it kind of food, though.
Do you have anything that's maybe pre-made or something?
Or like shelf stable?
Do you have to cook apples?
No, but if you do, and you sprinkle a little bit of brown sugar on there
and then you put some oats on the top, you put that in the oven.
Holy mackerel.
If only we had an oven or some sort of open flame in order to do this
at this very moment, because by golly, I would just love to do that.
Hey, hey, your magic's all fucked up.
Could you make a flame?
Well, I mean, I did make that bonfire there
the last time accidentally, but maybe I can do it.
Maybe you could do it accidentally on purpose.
Yeah, it sounds like just what we need.
I'll try to do it this time.
Hold on a second.
Is there like a good place where this should probably go?
Well, we can just clear the way here.
Yeah, maybe make a circle with some large rocks or something
rather than just like right by that huge mound of dry wheat.
Yeah, that's probably not the best spot.
That'll go up real fast.
Toby, Toby, help me help me clear this out of the way here.
And a younger gentleman comes over and starts clearing the wheat away.
So what are we what are we doing?
We're making things that sound delicious.
All right, grandma.
And they clear out a space for you.
Perfect.
I thought for sure he was her younger lover because why?
Maybe Moot thinks real hard
about what happened the last time he accidentally cast this spell
and he attempts to create a bonfire
in the space that's been provided to him.
OK, a couple of questions.
Are we still creating bonfires on your spell sheet?
Yes.
Did we determine how we were not creating bonfires?
I can't quite remember because you we switched it for some reason,
but I can't remember the reason.
I switched something else to it.
So I still have it as create bonfire.
I have switched a different spell out, though.
OK, OK, sounds good.
So they just kind of randomly come and go as right as time passes.
Second question.
Second question, three fingers, second question, three fingers.
I can count a second question.
What number are you at on your wild magic rolls?
I think you're at a three.
Yes, three, three.
I think it was 10 percent the last time we remembered to roll,
but I think I did something since then.
So, yeah, OK, that's a seven.
All right. The bonfire.
You describe the bonfire to me as it sets up.
The bonfire kind of just springs where there was nothing.
All of a sudden, there is a bonfire.
It's about five feet tall, five feet wide,
essentially a cube like in shape.
And yeah, this bonfire is just roaring.
It's like you don't need to feed any fuel onto it.
It's already full blast.
I think we should probably put some rocks around the other side
because we miscalculated the whole size of this thing.
I was thinking something small.
This is very impressive.
You've done such a good job, but oh, my goodness.
It's not really what I was expecting.
And we hurriedly get some rocks around.
I just tried to do it like I did it last time.
And it was pretty big last time.
So several passerbys are shocked and surprised.
And Toby is kind of corralling them, trying to get rocks,
creating a perimeter around before this spreads to other areas of this open market.
Um, grandma yells out,
Oh, Toby, get some mallows.
We're going to have a good snack right now.
Marshmallows exist in this room.
They do now. I said mallows.
So they could be could be something else.
I'm going to go to Rolf and get like, uh,
hmm, not a pot.
Well, like whatever a pot equivalent, a big frying pan on a long handle.
Get some apples.
Yeah, I start cutting them up with my dagger.
We're really adding them in.
Cut some apples, get a little cinnamon on there.
And we probably have oats because of Rolf.
So I assume we're ready to to make this.
Grandma, you got any brown sugar or sugar of any kind?
You know, sweetener, some kind of honey, some syrup.
Hold tight, Toby.
Take this down to sugar, Fred.
And he is going to give you some sugar for this wheat.
He's he was asking for it earlier.
He was asking for the wheat from from your dear old grandma.
Was he asking for it?
I thought he was asking for the sugar.
Grandma. Well, we'll see.
Quickly, quickly.
Toby goes running off, comes back in a few moments with some sugar.
Said he was real weird about it.
Said, thanks, I'll see your grandma later.
Not sure what quite what he means there.
But here's your sugar, friends.
Yeah, it's going to be worth it.
That weird interaction is going to be so worth the delicious dessert we're going to eat.
These apples will completely make you forget about what's going to happen
between that guy and your grandma later.
Great. I look forward to them.
All right.
Whoever's preparing these primarily, roll me a roll.
Can I roll?
I think I've previously set myself up as a culinary artiste,
only this time I'm hopefully not going to poison anybody.
OK, what would we say cooking would fall under here?
Probably performance.
Yeah, maybe performance.
Performance? Oh, it's all in the wrist.
Sure. It's all in the wrist of the flipping.
Yeah. So, yeah, we'll say, yeah, your performance dictates how well you do here.
Oh, my.
Well, that's a four.
Somebody can assist and then can help and then give advantage.
Maybe Sully is like getting so much flourish going with the chopping and stuff
and then accidentally like fumbles the pan that we're trying to make it in.
So I'm going to try and grab it.
Yeah, grab it, grab that hot pan, which I do previously said.
Yeah, fair enough.
So that's a 14, 14.
Yeah. So, Sully, you go a little you get a little too into it.
Glim, you notice this and you snatch it and catch it and salvage the day.
There's a little bit of a cheer because you've created somewhat of a crowd
with this large bonfire and this showmanship of creating these apples.
And grandma comes over, says, are they done yet?
Love to eat those.
It's going to take a little while, but maybe you can do a brisk business.
All these people come in to see what we're doing.
They're going to smell this delicious scent of this magnificent dessert.
And those apples are going to be flying off your cart.
I like the way you think, sugar.
She goes over and she is she's calling people over.
She says, you can get your apples.
You can taste these.
You can take them home, hang on over to sugar, Fred's,
and he's going to hook you up with the brown sweet stuff.
Can you stop with the hand motion?
The brown sweet stuff that you put on, then you heat these up
exactly like these have shown you.
And then you're going to get them.
We're going to chop up samples here.
You just come get your orders.
And she's going and getting orders done up.
And I think we're just like making them.
And as I think so, too, we're suddenly we're like really into it all of a sudden.
Oh, yeah. Like we've we work here now because people are looking at us
and it smells good.
And it's like our last interaction in the last town was quite bad.
I almost got arrested for the pamphlets.
So I got kidnapped. I think this is much better.
This is a much more pleasant experience we're having in High Moon.
So I kind of like like go to talk to Grandma for a second as she passes.
And I'm just like, hey, wait, she passes.
Oh, no. Yes.
Actually, I can speak to her spirit.
I say, hey, Grandma, you got a minute here.
We came into town and we love what we're doing over here.
It's so freaking fantastic.
Oh, sorry, sorry. Yes. Yeah. You take these apples.
Yeah. Yeah. I'll take that money. Perfect.
Yeah. Do you know where the Temple of Ahma is?
The Temple of Ahma? Yeah, that's the one.
Yeah, absolutely.
We here we call it the Leaves of Learning.
But it is a temple of Ahma.
And it's just a little bit for actually,
you can see the peak of it just over and off to the east.
That's fantastic. Thanks, Grandma.
Orders up.
You distribute out all of these apples
and everybody is very happy with them.
Grandma comes over to you after kind of the bonfire has died down
and everybody's gone their separate ways.
And he says, well, that's the that's the busiest day I've had in a long time.
Here, you guys were you.
You three were so pivotal in this.
You get the wheat for free in here.
I'm going to flip you a couple couple gold for your troubles,
because this was a really good day for for old grandma here.
Come on. It's about to get better.
You go over see Mr. Sugar Shack over there.
Am I right? Oh, good golly.
That's going to be a good time.
Hmm.
More, more, please.
More, a little bit lower.
Oh, just thinking about it right now.
Well, you go get some grandma.
Don't you don't don't you're on.
Toby, you shut her down.
Grandma, don't don't wait up.
All right, you guys.
Grandma told me earlier where the Temple of Agama is.
Oh, thank goodness.
I got so caught up in the apple making.
It was so fun.
It was very responsible on me,
but I kind of think that maybe I don't want Merv to die.
So, oh, I mean, I assume because he's your very good friend.
Mm hmm. Exactly.
So, yeah, I guess at the temple,
I'm so full of apple crisp now that I don't.
That was good. I could take a nap.
But, you know, destiny saved the world.
Save Merv, et cetera, et cetera.
Let's go to the temple. Yeah, let's go.
You follow the directions from grandma,
following the peak that you can see up
and over the building there.
And you make your way through the streets.
And it's very well put together town.
And you come to stand outside of the Temple of Agama,
also known as the Leaves of Learning.
It is a large, almost cathedral like building.
There are leaves carved into the pillars
that kind of surround or extend across the front.
And it leads up a large staircase
to large double doors that are presently closed.
It is, I mean, you probably spent a couple hours
making up apples.
Yeah, likely.
So it's kind of mid afternoon.
It's a thing with an apple crisp, Rusty.
You can't rush that. You can't rush that, no.
I get it. That'll be your downfall.
You don't want them to, you don't want crunch.
If you want one of those Michelin stars,
you got to take your time on that.
That's right.
New character goals, Michelin stars.
Michelin stars.
Guys, this building's fucking beautiful.
It's so gorgeous.
This town is really, I really am enjoying it here.
Maybe we settle down here.
After we save the world and everything,
we'll come back here.
Kick our feet up, make apple crisp.
I mean, like the architecture of this.
I don't know if I ever told you this,
but I was an archeologist.
No, really?
Yes, and I would go around
and look at all the beautiful architecture
and sketch up my own building ideas.
Wow, did you ever make anything like this?
No, no.
I assisted on a lot of projects that,
I mean, you would probably know a few,
but I don't want to name drop.
Oh, but you never took the reins for yourself.
Well, you know, I didn't just,
I just didn't want to be in the limelight.
You know, it wasn't about that.
It was about the beauty of the buildings.
Yeah, I mean, this one is,
look at the carved leaves and-
Gorgeous.
I guess, should we knock?
Yes, I don't know.
You go into temples more than we do.
Do you just go in?
Like a-
Well, I haven't, this one is so grand though.
And the leaves of learning, is it a school?
Is it-
Big library maybe?
So yeah, Agma's whole deal is like knowledge and learning.
So, I don't really know if that means
we can just walk right in or if we need to knock,
but I guess we'll learn.
Oh, that's a good one.
That's how they, what, that's amazing.
He starts teaching you before you're even in the building.
Exactly.
So clever.
Do you think that Agma is like friends with Bahamut?
Yeah, probably.
Yeah, sure, why not?
I mean, let's see if Agma's like real chill
or like what his whole deal is,
but knowledge, Bahamut,
I think those are really compatible.
For a second I was like,
do you think that we're gonna meet Agma and then-
It's entirely possible.
Who knows?
Every time you enter a temple,
don't you meet your deity?
Don't you?
Exactly.
With the way that Glyn communes with hers,
I mean, they're like this.
I've linked my two fingers.
Not as close as Grandma and Sugar Fred, but well, maybe.
Right about now, nobody's as close
as Grandma and Sugar Fred.
We all wish we could be as close
as Grandma and Sugar Fred.
I see a weird t-shirt in the future.
Grandma and Sugar Fred.
Very niche, very in-joke.
You wanna do some,
I know you said you wanted to keep it clean,
but Grandma and Sugar Fred seems like it needs something.
I do have to say
that the Baja Maniac's design that Chrissy did
is just out of this world good.
So good.
It's fantastic. It's so good.
You can find that at T-Public in our T-Public store.
I'll link it down in the description.
All right, well, I guess this isn't technically my mission.
I guess we're all here because of me,
so I'm just gonna knock on the door.
You're right.
You walk up and you knock on the door
and you hear it echoes loud on the inside.
And after a brief moment,
you hear some footsteps coming up to the door.
There's a, it sounds like they kind of scuffle
on the other side and it pulls open.
And an older woman with short curly white hair
steps out and she's in brown, like a brown tunic.
She pokes her head out and she says,
yes, is there something I can help you with?
Hello, my name is Sullivan Sleight
and I am here with my friends
in search of a particular scroll.
Sure, come on, come on in, come on in.
We have lots of scrolls.
Yes, my name is, my name is Kiral.
I am the priestess here at the Leaves of Learning.
Come in, come in.
And you enter and it's brightly lit inside.
There are pews that go up to the front.
There are images of scrolls all over
in various tapestries and in carvings in different plaques.
At the front, there is a shrine
that is like stacked with scrolls.
Right, like almost to the ceiling.
I see you have many scrolls.
Yep.
Pardon, pardon, child, yes, come on in.
Have a seat.
Are you from around here?
Are you traveling?
You're clearly, I haven't seen you here before.
I mean, I'm very pleased to have you.
Well, we've come a very long ways
in search of the scroll of Agma.
The scroll of Ag, of Agma, Agma.
Oh, Agma.
Agma, yes.
Agma.
We thought there was a lot of A's and it was Agma.
No, yes, O-G-H-M-A.
So I'm glad that you've come to learn a scroll, you say.
Yes.
Could you just, could you describe the scroll
or perhaps the context of which
scroll you're looking for?
I would be able to help you a lot more
if you gave me some, something to go on
because we have many scrolls on Agma.
Do you have like the scroll?
Is there like, you know, you know the one?
I feel like you're alluding to something
and as knowledge-filled as I am having read
the majority of these scrolls.
That's really impressive.
Thank you.
I still need more context than the scroll.
Was there like one that's like the most important one?
She just kind of tweaks her head to the side.
Just one second, one second.
Can you guys come here for a second?
Of course, I'll just be over here, cleaning up.
Kind of like out of love a little bit, I'm like.
Sure, Sully, what's up?
Guys, they just told me to find the scroll
in the Temple of Agma, but I don't know what.
But there's like a thousand scrolls here.
I thought there would be like one on a, on a, on a.
Oh, like on a pedestal?
Yeah, you know, like it was the scroll.
Sure.
It doesn't seem to be that way.
Excuse me, Kirill?
Yes, of course.
Sorry, what did you say your name was again?
Sullivan Slyte. Sullivan Slyte.
But you can call me Sully.
Yes, Sully.
So like I was sent here by Leydon Menda?
Leydon Menda, yes.
Who would like to have the scroll of Agma.
Well, I mean, we do know Leydon Menda here.
He is, he comes to visit quite frequently,
not quite frequently, it's been a while since.
He's here all the fucking time,
like why on earth am I here right now?
No, it's been a couple of years since he's been here.
He does stop in, he is very-
Pardon my language, sorry.
Of course, it's okay.
Language is knowledge.
When he pardons himself, he does like a weird like bow.
And knowing is half the battle.
Only you can stop forest fires.
He does come quite frequently.
There was, now that you mention it,
there was a fellow in, an elephant fellow with a weasel
and who gave me, saying that somebody was coming
for Leydon Menda's scroll, so this is good.
Yes, that's me.
Oh, thank you so much.
Of course, yes, let me go find that.
She'll be just back in my office here
and she exits the main chapel area for a brief moment.
Sometimes all you gotta do is ask.
I guess I wasn't entirely sure
because it really doesn't feel like
this whole trip is on the up enough,
if you know what I mean.
Well, he did, they kidnapped you
to tell you the information, so it seemed like maybe.
Anytime you get put in a burlap sack
and then you're told to do something
or someone else is gonna die, it's usually.
Yeah, I mean, it's not great.
No, just.
You think you're working in a secret sort of zone,
but I guess not.
No, I guess we're really just messengers.
See, we're learning so much already.
I also feel better about it.
And Kiral's in on it.
Oh, maybe.
Okay, I feel less better about it now, though.
Okay.
I found it.
And she comes out and she's holding a scroll
and she walks over to you and hands it to you
and you look at it and it's a scroll.
Cool.
It looks like it's sealed with what looks like
the, an impression of a goat's skull.
Oh, wow.
Hey, look, it would have been you.
Oh, and I hold the scroll up to it.
Oh, right.
I can't.
But except you are a sheep,
but I mean, it's still in the barnyard family.
Thank you so much for this, Kiral.
Of course.
Kiral, what's the image on the seal?
Like a goat's head or?
Yes, let me see one more time.
That looks like it could be,
if I'm not mistaken, a symbol of a orcas.
Um.
Okay, neat.
That's great.
I put it in my bag.
And we shall never talk of this again.
Okay.
Bye.
Leighton does much learning.
I wouldn't, you seem nervous.
I wouldn't read too much into it.
He likes to know a lot about all sorts of regions
and different groups of people.
The gentleman who dropped this off assured me
that this was for his knowledge.
Well, there's no reason not to trust that person
because this is the temple of knowledge.
So why would anyone come here for any other reason?
And just as a reminder,
who did you say dropped it off for?
There was a man with a ferret or a weasel,
I think you said.
Yes.
His name, I believe, was Arlo.
Arlo Tetrin.
But yes, he was an Elven man.
Nicely dressed, looked like in clean press clothes.
Kind of normal adventurer's clothes,
you travel the road with.
And yes, I guess you could describe it
as like an albino weasel,
but it was an all-white weasel.
Well, isn't that a whimsical pet?
That's fun.
I thought so.
It seemed very nice.
Well, thank you so much.
If you haven't heard, which you might nod of,
grandma with the stand right when you first come into town,
we showed her how to make this amazing dessert with apples
and she's been,
she might even be sold out of apples now,
but if you head back tomorrow,
I bet she'll make it again.
You're gonna wanna check it out.
It is delicious.
Also, I'm gonna jump in there
because I don't think this is just a dessert.
I'm talking breakfast, snacks.
I don't think there's a bad time
to have this apple crisp.
Good?
I agree. Apple crisp?
With an apple base,
you can have it for breakfast.
Like it's sweet, but it's not too sweet?
Hmm.
This sounds most delightful.
I'm gonna have to swing by grandma's shop tomorrow.
I wish I gave her a name, but I didn't.
So I wish I'm gonna swing by.
Her name is grandma.
I'm gonna swing by grandma's shop
and learn about this.
Thank you very much.
Do you have a place to stay?
You seem,
are you headed out right away?
What are your plans?
You seem like three fine upstanding citizens.
Well, we love this town.
It's so nice.
We've had such a warm welcome,
but I think we have to get going.
You're on all these missions and picking up things
and going and doing other things.
Deliverance scrolls.
It's, it's-
Don't someone could die, you know.
Fair enough.
Pretty standard stuff.
Just no rest.
So I think still pretty early in the day,
we might have to hit the old road.
Okay.
Well, it's been a pleasure to meet you three.
Please do give my best to Leydon
and we can't wait to see him again.
Hopefully the scroll is delivered safely.
Thank you for coming into the Leaves of Learning.
Oh, oh, I had one last question before we go.
Of course.
My friend Glim here is pretty big on Bahamut.
And I was just curious,
are Agma and Bahamut friendly with one another
or like what's the deal there?
Well, not unfriendly by any means.
That's what I said.
I said knowledge and Bahamut stands for justice.
I mean, these are compatible goals.
Even if, you know, I believe in my heart
that Bahamut is the ultimate God.
Like it's, there are others and that's fine.
Sully's like slowly.
Everybody is entitled to their own beliefs.
If anybody-
But Agma rolls.
You know what, you come back tomorrow morning.
If you're still in town, no pressure.
You will hear a lovely sermon of Agma
and you can hear the ways of him,
but it's best to take in all ideas.
I agree.
Did you, do you have a lot of knowledge
about Bahamut at the Leaves of Learning
or did you want me to leave?
I have some information.
Well, if you have any information,
we do have some scrolls on Bahamut
and all of the greater deities of the land,
but we always take more information
if you have something.
I just, I have this small,
just in case there's anything new in it.
How to praise,
do people have difficulty praising one's God?
Well, you'd be surprised.
And with Bahamut,
you really get a real direct line
through physical activity.
So it's sort of like a different kind of,
like with Agma, you probably read a book,
I assume, or like you learn
and that's how you kind of can commune.
You just take a look.
You read a book.
It like opens your mind into many colors.
It like really expands things.
It's like some kind of like a rainbow when you read.
It's really, yeah.
I'm going to read through this pamphlet
and perhaps tomorrow implement some of the ideas
towards my sermon,
getting people up and moving.
I mean, they stand up, they sit down,
they stand up, they sit down,
but that's not the same.
Maybe we just need to get that blood flow
and that'll really get things to stick in the mind.
Exactly, exactly.
I feel like we could just talk for hours,
but like I said,
scrolls to deliver, lives to save,
blah, blah, blah.
So maybe if we're back in town,
I can swing by.
Please do.
We could talk some more.
We'll put the tea on.
Just let us know when you're coming.
Great, thank you.
I'm afraid that we've like somehow
broken glim a little bit.
She said lives to save
and then she said blah, blah, blah.
Yeah, I mean, she's always,
well, I think just the problem is
she always gets bogged down in the whole
I've got a destiny to save the world
and now she's just trying to keep it
a little shorter for us
because we've got things to do.
Oh, maybe that did.
I think the intention is still 100% there for Glim.
She just knows that we're on a bit of a time crunch
here with the whole Merv situation.
Cool, I just got a little bit worried
because I didn't want to like,
you know, like taint her.
She's like,
well, she's like kind of perfect, you know.
I don't think there's anything that
you or I could do to change that.
All right, let's get going.
We left poor Rolf outside.
Well, he had that pile of hay though.
He's pretty happy.
Fair enough.
But let's go because I'm getting worried about Merv
and I just, what if it takes us
a super long time to get to Cirlun?
I know this part has gone so quickly
and so easily, I guess.
We just need to get to Cirlun
and then get the thing and then get back
and save Merv.
It's very important.
I've been so worried about him
ever since we first met
in the Fallen Tower.
Oh, hold on.
I'm sorry.
Kiro?
Yes, of course.
We're going to Cirlun.
Is there like a highway,
like a straight shot?
Any information you can give us
to get us there quickly?
This puppy's gotta go on a boat, I think.
I can't remember.
The quickest way is going to actually be
to follow the river.
So you're gonna have to cross the river going south
and then there is a pathway
that will lead you down through a city
that I can't quite read
because the print is so small.
A city called, you're gonna wanna pass the bridge,
go over the bridge, head south at Arken Bridge.
That's the city that crosses the river.
You're gonna wanna head south from there
and that will get you through Cirlun.
It's not a well-traveled path.
Usually it cuts along the coast.
You could head a little bit west,
go down through Deirloon,
and then head back up through Cirlun,
but it sounds like you're in a bit of a rush.
We gotta go fast.
Yeah, you're gonna wanna head south,
get to Arken Bridge, go south from there.
Well, how many days journey would you say that is?
Eight or nine.
Okay, we have to go.
Okay, bye.
Bye, it was so nice to meet you.
Bye, we've gotta go.
Silly quickly, like.
Pleasure.
Runs out.
Guys, we gotta go.
We gotta go now.
I don't know, like, yeah.
We gotta, come on, come on, come on, let's go.
We climb back aboard the carriage.
Hi-ya!
As Rolf slowly starts to leave the city.
I think she made it mean that it was gonna be
like eight or nine days on like a regular horse.
We're moving at like a slow, super slow speed right now.
Well, once he gets going,
it's just he's so full up on all that hay, maybe.
Once he gets rolling.
Yeah, he'll be fine, it's Rolf, of course.
He'll get us there.
We see our trio aboard their carriage
rolling across the Dale lands,
entering into the region of Sembia.
We're gonna montage this a little bit.
Give me something exciting that everybody passes
as they're going on this journey.
Is it like foresty?
Is it deserty?
Is it?
The first part, you're gonna run into some forest.
You're gonna pass through the arch wood.
I see some unicorns running along the side of the trail.
I get very excited.
Wow, that is exciting.
You, for those that know about unicorns,
if anybody wants to roll a nature check.
Five plus one nature, who knows?
That's 11. 12.
Yeah, the nine's not gonna do it.
Yeah, this is amazing.
You don't know anything about unicorns specifically.
The majestic beasts.
Or mythology of them,
or if there ever is more than one there,
but you see them.
On our travels, we encounter a road
that is just covered in sheep that have escaped their field.
All right.
Rolf slows as you're trying to get through these sheep.
There's just bleating all over the place.
You may wanna enunciate a little bit.
I said bleating.
I sound like bleeding all over the place.
You got headphones on.
It's bleating.
I'm slashing left, right, and center.
I gotta get to merve.
Get out of the way, sheep.
It's a bloodbath.
Somebody roll me either an animal handling or an attack.
Whichever way you wanna take this.
I mean, animal handling for sure.
That's a four for me.
I got a 19, and Moot's gonna channel his inner sheep
and try to get them to move off of the road.
So describe.
Bah!
Pointing, and air traffic control.
Straight up speaking sheep.
This way and that way.
How do Glim and Sully react to Moot's sheepisms?
I kinda feel like we watch,
and then we look at each other,
and look back and just like, wow.
Wow, still some of it in him, hey?
I don't know if he'd all have a leaf.
Once you're a sheep,
I guess you just always kinda have some sheepy magic.
Would you say you've cast any magic along the way?
No, I don't think so.
I think he's trying to do this one
without any magical abilities.
Perfect, okay.
I think maybe we see another carriage approaching,
and I'm like, oh, guys, hold on,
and I jump off our carriage and run up to it.
And I'm like, hey, I don't have very long,
but I was just wondering if you guys wanted
to hear a little bit about Bahamut just real quick.
We're just passing through,
but he's this really great guy,
and I think he really has a lot to offer,
and they're just staring at me.
I don't even know if they speak common.
There's just no, just nothing.
Hey, where are you guys going?
Wait, are you guys,
are you going to High Moon?
It's so great there.
You're gonna really love it.
You might wanna check out the Leaves of Learning,
but not until you read this pamphlet,
and I hand out some pamphlets to everybody.
And then by then, our carriage has caught up,
and they're crossing,
and I'm like, okay, it was really great to meet you guys.
I hope I'll see you soon.
Just like a drive-by across the Littites.
I love it, yep.
I feel like that would be an interaction
where one of the squeegee guys comes over to your window,
and you're like, no, thanks,
and they're like, well, I'm here already,
so they just do it.
You pass through Arkham Bridge,
and it is a largely human city.
It's sprawling and bustling,
and it's loud and as busy as the streets of Waterdeep.
As you get up to it,
the walls look like they've been built
and rebuilt several times.
You can see where sections have crashed down
and been brought back up.
You are allowed in and through the city
without any real issues or concerns.
Nobody goes to stop you.
Do you take time in this city, or do you keep on going?
I think so.
I don't think so.
I think we gotta keep on rolling.
Another several days pass.
You're reaching the eighth day since you've left High Moon,
and you've traveled through this not well.
It's definitely not any sort of created path.
It's just a worn travel path
that looks like it's just been worn down
just by random people going by.
It's not as busy as the city roads
or as the main roads going out.
And on that eighth day,
you reach the edge of the city of Saraloon,
and Saraloon is a harbor city.
You see the sea out beyond
as you kind of crest over this large hill
that rolls down towards the coastline.
It's very Gothic architecture,
and as you get up to it,
and even before, as you're kind of walking in,
you notice that you're being watched
by several helms or guards
dressed in full metal plate,
and they appear to be patrolling.
None of them on the further outskirts stop you.
They just kind of watch you
as you're going by, observing.
But as you get to the gates,
it opens up and into the city,
and you are stopped by two of these helmed guards,
and they step out in front of you.
They are each carrying a large spear and shield,
and they step up to your carriage as you slow down,
and they say,
what is your business in Saraloon?
Hello, friends.
We are heading, we are just passing through
to get to a boat to send a scroll to Layden Menda.
It worked last time when we mentioned his name,
so maybe it's gonna work this time.
It's worth a shot.
So you're here on business.
Yeah, I'm not.
Courier business.
Yeah, courier business.
We're just messenger boys and lady.
Of course.
The person or the guard you're talking to
takes a step back and allows you through and into the city.
I tip my invisible hat.
They make no move after that.
They allow you to roll by, and you're in the city.
It is, as you get in, you see more of this
is Gothic architecture, and sprinkled throughout,
you see high up on many buildings,
gargoyles and other similar decorations.
Just so you know, this type of architecture is
Gothic architecture, you can tell
because of all the really sad,
angry-looking stuff around.
And when you look at the buildings,
you too get a feeling of being sad and angry,
and it just makes you want to be alone
and listen to all chemical romance.
Have you guys?
I don't know if I know them.
Heard that band before?
Yeah, it's a band.
Can you dance to it?
Can you like dance to it?
Can you zoom it to it?
Is it pretty upbeat?
You can pry to it a lot.
Like you can just like sit down
and just have a good, just a good sabbath, you know?
Right.
Well, why would they design buildings that make you sad?
Well, I mean, because from my archeology studies,
buildings, just as in books and other types of art
are meant to evoke different types of emotions.
Shit, that sounded like semi-smart coming from them.
That one seems real.
Damn it.
I think you're right
because remember we were in high moon
and it just felt so like warm and welcoming
and here it's so- All the different colored doors
and it was just so open, yeah.
It's like oppressive
and all the like gargoyles are staring at us
and the guards are staring at us
and it just is not,
we're not gonna get to make apple crisp here
is what I'm saying.
But what if we did?
It could turn the whole place around.
Oh shit, man.
Well, let's deliver this scroll first
and then try to change different types of civilizations.
Agreed.
Gotta save Merv.
Let's head to the harbor.
Cereloon is a large city
and as you're walking through it,
everybody make a perception check.
Three.
18.
Seven.
Okay.
As you're walking through,
you see many different symbols.
Some on like banners and flags.
Some painted on or scrawled on different walls.
You see one of what looks like an eyeless mask.
It has, you can see the nose and mouth
but completely smooth over the eyes.
You see images on some glimpses specifically.
You see like smaller icons for lack of a better term
of like two blades, two daggers or knives crossed
and they're almost like they're trying to be hidden
but still obvious that they're there.
Just kind of worked into the architecture around them
and predominantly as you get further
into the center of this city,
before you hit the dock area,
you see an image of a dragon head
and five distinctly colored scratches behind that head.
You know that to be the symbol of the cult of the dragon.
Guys, do you see that?
That one.
The two gargoyles humping over there?
That's an interesting choice.
That's, I mean I guess gargoyles gotta be like grandma
and sugar, no, so that symbol that's a dragon,
that's the cult of the dragon.
What?
Do you think they must be gone, right?
Like that can't exist anymore.
The decimators came and they.
Yeah, for sure.
I'm just gonna go into the back of the covered wagon
just right, and by covered wagon I mean,
I'm just gonna cover myself with a blanket
in the back of this wagon, just for no reason.
Have a good nap.
Yeah, I'm tired.
I'll let you know if I see any more funny gargoyles.
Only if they're humping.
Okay.
Sully for sure like hides under a blanket
in the back of it.
Yeah, and you, as you were going through the city,
you didn't notice them,
whether you were distracted by humping gargoyles
or some other thing.
I was looking at the goth buildings.
But as, yeah, as soon as you see them,
you recognize them as the symbol for the followers of TMA.
Moot and Glim after Sully's show of, I don't.
Sleepiness.
Yeah.
I'll give you.
I mean, he's a pretty weird dude.
I don't know how out of character that would have seemed.
Sure, okay.
You carry on through the middle of the city.
The further, the closer to the center of the city you go,
the darker in both the literal and figurative sense
the city seems.
Like you feel like you're being watched on all sides.
As you pass through, there are these helmed guards
that you saw before the city
and at the city gates everywhere.
And you pass through and you get to
kind of where the city rolls down a final hill
and to the coastline.
And out overlooking the coast,
you see the harbor and it is filled with ships.
Do we know which one we're looking for?
I don't think so.
Sully, you better.
I think we're at the harbor.
We gotta figure out what to do now.
Do you have any more instructions from the kidnapping?
I literally just like peek my head up
from under one of the blankets and say,
no, it just says get it onto the ship.
Incidentally, I don't.
But I think that maybe if we just go around
like we have been doing previously and just say,
this is for Leyden Menda.
Is there a boat going out for Leyden Menda?
One scroll ordered for Leyden Menda.
I'm starting to wonder if maybe you should take
my three week intensive note taking course.
I feel like it would do a lot of good
for when you're the one left with writing down
the directions for things.
I just learned a few things.
Number one, I had no idea that you offered a course
taking notes. Oh, yes.
And number two, I don't know if I,
in that specific situation,
even if training would have kicked in for me
in that life or death kind of moment,
but I'm under the impression that just as
I was not told what kind of scroll to get,
I was also not told what kind of boat to put it on
or anything like that.
So I was told, hold on,
and just remember something right now
that they would find me.
Okay, so they'll find you.
That's great news to know.
See, if we dig a little deeper,
sometimes we can come up with more information.
Now, the beauty of my three week course
is that I break you down and rebuild you from nothing.
So that way it's just instinctual
that no matter the situation,
you're able to take those accurate notes.
I'm gonna have to ask, how do you break someone down?
I've been broken down once before and it wasn't pleasant.
Does yours include? Oh, no, it is not pleasant.
You have to sign a waiver and everything.
Oh, geez.
Wow, I'm so impressed.
I had no idea you were starting
this whole side business.
Good for you.
That's a real like,
entrepreneurial skill that you've got there
that I had no idea existed within you.
Yeah, wow, Moo, what a surprise.
Sully from off and behind the carriage,
you hear a door like booted open
and then you hear a very familiar voice
and it calls out,
hey, Benty, we gotta get down to the ship there.
Yeah, Barty, I'm coming.
Come on, hold your horses, they'll wait for us.
You turn and you look and you see
two more hulking figures,
the scarred hands and faces of your trainers,
cohorts when you ran from the forest that day,
Benty and Barty.
Guys, can we go any faster?
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Have a great week and we'll talk soon.
He's read a lot of books.
Moot knows some things.
I have a tab here.
Hold please.
You have many tabs there.
Look, there was a lot of planning this afternoon
and I just needed to know,
apparently I don't have that tab anymore.
Hold please.
Ogma, Ogma, Ogma.
Oh, I thought it was Ogma.
Everybody's been saying Og.
I have notes.
I found this and it says,
High Moon in the Dale lands.
Find scroll temple, Ogma.
A-A-H-G-M-A-H.
Take to Sirloon, south of High Moon.
Head to castle.
Ten days, laden men.
And then I've trailed off.
I am, what's the word?
Horny.
That's the one.
Nailed it.
Everybody's horny.
Something in the water.
Right.
What's the name of a person, a cleric?
Not a cleric, a priest.
Scrum monk.
Priest.
Priestess.
Priest.
It looks like it's sealed with an impression
of something.
Jerry Seinfeld.
What's the deal with scrolls?
It looks like it's.
That's how you like seal something, right?
It's not wax.
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